So, I have a wonderful sister-in-law here in Alaska who is up for any girly stuff as long as it doesn’t have anything to do with babies. She jokes that she’s missing that mommy chromosome. Lucky for her, her husband doesn’t really need to have kids either, so they make a good fit. My little sister loves kids, but she’s miles and miles away in California. And all I want? To go shopping for comfy clothes and stuff to keep me busy when all I feel like doing is sitting around. But I hate shopping alone. Today, however, my wonderful hubby gave me a wonderful gift. He took me shopping!…

Ok, if you don’t want details, skip this one… Early early on, even in the first pregnancy, I had symptoms. I was tender up front, my tummy wouldn’t stop rolling, I got a little gassier than normal… This week though, takes the cake. I still have drainage from the flu that had rattled me the last two weeks and it makes me constantly feel like I’m destined to throw up. I have seemingly constant gas pain, which I originally panicked and assumed was cramps from a miscarriage on the way, but weren’t. I’m exhausted and my nose is super super sensitive. For instance, this morning I woke up because my…

I’ve found at least one way so far to stay a little distracted from the pregnancy side-effects… trying to choose baby names.  GIRL NAMES Anabelle Claire Becwar(Grace-Favour/Clear-Bright) Liesel Marie Becwar(My God is a vow/Bitter) Klara Adalene Becwar(Clear-Bright/Noble One) Brigitta Isabelle Becwar(The Exhalted One/My God is a Vow) Mirabelle Ilianna Becwar(Lovely/The Lord has Responded) Nicolette Becwar(Victory of the People/) Valerie Becwar(To be Healthy-Strong/) BOY NAMES Hunter Elliot Becwar(Hunter/My God is the Lord) Fredrick Isaiah Becwar(Peaceful Ruler/God is My Salvation) Theodor Isaac Becwar(Gift from God/He Laughs) Aaron Vaughn Becwar(Mountain/Small) Nathaniel Reuben Becwar(Gift of God/Behold, a son) Noah Becwar(Rest,comfort/) Spencer Becwar(Someone who gives out Goods/) The above are some of my ideas. I’d…

So… last summer (2006), my parents finally came to visit me here in Fairbanks Alaska. On the day before they left, I took a pregnancy test – 3 actually – probably more because I’ve wanted kids my whole life than because I had symptoms, but who cares why – I took the tests. They came up positive. I told my parents, called my husband, told my in-laws (who we happen to live with), called the great-grandparents to be… One week later – I miscarried. We knew having children might be a challenge for us. I’d had a strange cycle all of my life and most of my docs said they…

On March 27th, hubby and I went to the doctor for our final ultrasound. I had hubby come in case my “I am truly prepared – I can handle anything” attitude flew out the door. That and in case I got a case of the dizzys – this flu was still kicking my butt. The doctor kindly asked “You aren’t going to lose it if we don’t find anything, are you?”. He didn’t expect any good news and neither did we. I assured him I’d be fine. I told him I’d probably be quite quiet, but most likely could handle it. He did his thing, pulled up the image on…

On March 19th, I was in a panic. I’d had the flu for almost a week, with horrible night sweats, fevers off and on and horrible coughing. The worst thing about it was that my pregnancy symptoms had disappeared. Our OB agreed to meet with me if for nothing more than my mental health (her words.) Hubby drove me to the doctor and she performed a sonogram. We had thought I was 12 weeks pregnant, and this concerned her a great deal. She told us that if I was 12 weeks pregnant, she would guarantee I was going to miscarry – the fetus was only the size of a 6…

On March 22, I went in to the hospital to determine if my flu was simply kicking my rump or if my pregnancy-loss was causing health problems. (My insurance didn’t want a potential emergency like me going to a regular clinic…) The doctor assured me I wasn’t “septic” (what a word) and that I just had the major flu that is going around. They did my bloodwork -the second of two sets – to confirm my hormone levels were dropping – and they loaded me on meds to combat the flu. Lo and behold, my symptoms returned. I’ll spare you the details, but I knew what the symptoms were. Most…

The hubby and I have been trying to get our ducks in a row this year. We started off right… we paid off our debts & started saving for a down payment for a house. I started packing everything, thinking the home-buying process would be instantaneous or something – ha ha ha. We even almost adopted a second dog, but it turned out she doesn’t like children. We finally agreed we’d get a house, get settled, travel a bit, and in a few years try for kiddos again – or adopt – either way we weren’t going to make any more big decisions for a while. Then two of the…