If at first you don’t succeed…

The hubby and I have been trying to get our ducks in a row this year. We started off right… we paid off our debts & started saving for a down payment for a house. I started packing everything, thinking the home-buying process would be instantaneous or something – ha ha ha. We even almost adopted a second dog, but it turned out she doesn’t like children. We finally agreed we’d get a house, get settled, travel a bit, and in a few years try for kiddos again – or adopt – either way we weren’t going to make any more big decisions for a while.

Then two of the girls at my job announced they were pregnant. This was very exciting news. A full-time position might even open up for me. I was happy for the girls, but equally excited at the opportunities it would allow me at work. Then I realized – I hadn’t been feeling very well for a while. Lots of flu bugs had been going around, but nothing seemed to really go away and I was exhausted all of the time. I took a pregnancy test late at night on the 8th of March. I sat and prayed it would be negative. Not because I don’t want children, just because things were at what I thought the top of my stress-tolerance was. I wanted to try for kids when things were a little less stressful. Then I realized it wasn’t up to me at all. The test came up clear (digital tests are nice that way) – PREGNANT! I did the math online – I should be due in October. The panic set in and after lots of coaxing from hubby and phone calls to wake up Mom and best friend on east coast at about 3 am, I finally calmed down a bit.

It took me about no time to announce to everyone I was pregnant. I think my theory was that the more excited people I had around me, the more excited I would get. After the first miscarriage… this was all terrifying. But it meant everything was still working ok. And that was an advantage we’d never had before.